 Tanya P. Johnson: Making Radiance, a screenshot. Mechanics of aligning and organizing in the vessel. I am reading a book by Baron Baptiste, the founder of The Baptiste Institute. It’s called Perfectly Imperfect: The Art and Soul of Yoga Practice. In the chapter “The Dance of Yes and No,” Baptiste considers the connection between our yoga practice and our life. He says: “There are only two ways we show up on our mat and in life: as a yes, or as a no.”  What does he mean exactly? Yes carries the energy of possibility, whereas no carries the energy of resistance. Yes expresses your willingness to claim your power and use it to discover the real meaning of commitment. Yes invites you to expand and to come into your full creative expression. It opens you up and affirms your willingness to be teachable when you don’t have the know-how to get where you want to go.Yes affirms the existence of a destination in your yoga practice beyond mere physical gain. No, on the other hand, carries a very different energy, though (in my opinion) not wholly negative. It is closed, rigid, and often stubborn. It takes the forms of excuses, complaints, procrastination, resistance, frustration, and so on. No impedes or flat-out stops you in your tracks. You are always in a dance of yes or no. What is interesting to me is how being a yes for anything automatically makes you a no for something else. In fact, if we can’t point to what we are saying no to, then our yes means nothing. Think about it. If you are a yes for peace, then you are a no for war. If you are a yes for creating vibrancy and health in your body, you are a no for ingesting junk food, doing drugs, and so on. If you are a yes for full acceptance in your relationship, you are a no for criticizing and trying to change the person you love. If you are a yes for growth, you are a no for procrastination and stagnation. Baptiste then explores the no side of showing up on our mat and in our life. He says, “Looking at this from the other side of the lens, we see that saying no is the action of saying yes to something else.” Now consider the mindfulness aspect of becoming aware of your yes and no responses to your yoga practice and life. When you pause and consider what you are saying yes or no to, then you learn that in contrast to no, yes allows for a sense of timelessness and the joy of being fully in your experience. I share this with you to invite you to engage in your own inquiry of “What am I a yes for in my practice?” and “What do I refuse and say no to?” Or, to put it another way, “How am I showing up on my mat and in my life?” Esoteric but Tangible: Yes & No EnergyYes and no take the form of emotional energy, and emotions contain vibrations. That sounds esoteric, I know, but in your body and your being, you can feel it as something tangible. Think about when you’re around someone who is angry; you can feel that vibration of rage, can’t you? Similarly, someone who is happy gives off a different kind of vibration, radiating a sense of lightness and joy. These different vibrations of yes and no have an impact on your body and on your energetic capacity to support or block what you’re up to in the pose and in your life. Emotional vibrations fuel our actions. In other words, being a yes or being a no will dictate what you do or don’t do. Consider that when you are inspired by the possibility of something, your body vibrates at the perfect frequency to support you in achieving the thing that inspires you. The energetic vibration of yes carries the emotional energy of enthusiasm, which translates into action. You are naturally moved and inspired to create and achieve. The only way you or I can impact our practice is through action. Each asana/pose does not actually care about our intention, how committed we are, how we are feeling that day, or what we are thinking, and it most certainly has zero interest in whether we like it or dislike it. The asana’s only really evolve for us when we act into what we want to create. When you are a yes for what’s possible in your practice, you will act. And out of that action, you will expand and create a new physical reality. Be a participating player instead of a spectator to your own experience. “Being a yes inspires you to take the actions needed to move from where you are to where you want to go.” But is Yes always a positive? Sometimes there are those who fall into the trap of people pleasing. They tend to say yes when they really want to say no. In the practice of yoga asana, we can try authentically saying yes to what we want. Baptiste calls this aiming true. Carl Jung said that all consciousness begins with an act of disobedience. Our dignity is found in our ability to say no to the things we don’t want—to disobey the urge to say yes when we really want to say no—and open the door to saying yes to pursuing our true desires. Today, on your mat, are you a yes for deep, rhythmic breath (called ujjayi), or a no? If you are a yes, it will enable your breath to carry you with ease. Are you a yes for a fixed, steady gaze (drishti) or a no? If you are a yes, it will give you the action of focusing your gaze with intent and fire. Are you a yes for lightness and play on your mat, or a no? If you are a yes, your practice will be buoyed by joy. It’s important to know where your inner compass is pointing; this is how you consciously map your path. If you don’t have it set to say no to resistance and complaints, then by default you may inevitably say yes to procrastination. If you’ve been saying yes to procrastination, it’s important to get to the cause. Is procrastinating getting on your mat to practice yoga or meditation costing you the vitality, vibrancy, and health you want? Remember, to be a yes is to act. Saying yes to the practice of saying no to the habits and thoughts that no longer serve you becomes a great source of strength and confidence. The Energy of Yes is AcceptanceIn any pose, I’m always dealing with what is actually happening in my physical body. I can accept and empower what is so about my body, or I can oppose and resist what’s happening. Being for your body exactly as it is and as it is not is acceptance. The energy of yes is acceptance. Saying yes to accepting how things are and how they are not is a choice you make moment-to-moment, breath by breath. You can choose to be a yes for exactly how the pose is and how it is not, or you can oppose and resist. Yes holds the space for acceptance, and acceptance is the place from which you empower your body to generate some new result in the pose. Being a no for what is happening in your body is opposition. Opposition produces tension in your body and manifests as rigidity in the pose, both physical and emotional. Ordinarily, if we experience strong sensations or physical limitations, we oppose what’s happening in our bodies. To be against something is to be in reaction to it. In our body, we experience that as stress, discomfort, contraction, and shortness of breath. We don’t like that our bodies won’t or can’t do as we want, and emotionally, that leaves us with complaints, frustration, and resentment. I’ve met many people who have faced serious health challenges and crises. Most went through an initial period of being angry, resentful, or even in downright denial about their illness—all perfectly understandable reactions. But the ones who I am always most amazed by are the ones who get to the idea that resisting what is so is actually causing them greater emotional suffering than the illness itself. Accepting what was going on allowed them to flow with the new demands of their bodies in a much more empowered way. Acceptance of what is and is not happening—in a pose as in life—creates a mood of peace. As you engage in the dance of yes and no in the pose, you will discover that the muscles and the mood of your body become flexible and malleable in the energetic vibration of yes, and the experience of rigidity and unneeded hardness will begin to dissolve like ice in the warm sun. Your No Pose Tanya P. Johnson: Visual Mantra: The Architecture of Bowing. Every student has their no pose. Maybe even more than one haha. You know your no pose: it’s the one that makes you inwardly groan when the teach calls for it, and likely leads you to automatically think, Ugh.... I don’t want to, I can’t do this one. But you actually don’t know for sure that you can’t do that pose. What you’ve come up against isn’t necessarily a physical limitation. Resistance can be very deceiving behind the many masks it wears. Maybe you haven’t been able to do that pose in the past, but what about today? The yogis say you can never step into the same river twice because the current is always shifting and changing. You’ve never stepped into this exact river before today. Not with this body, not with today’s particular energy, with the specific number of bites of breakfast in your belly, with the earth tipped on its exact axis. Perhaps up until now, you haven’t had a breakthrough in this pose, but that was then. What’s possible today? Every pose is a new opportunity, each and every time. All the work you’ve done up until now has led you to this precise moment, to face precisely what you’re facing. Yoga is a dance of dealing with what is and allowing yourself to fully experience whatever you’re experiencing right here, in the moment. In life, we so often resist what we don’t like or don’t want to do. Here, on your mat, is a safe opportunity to see what’s on the other side of that. Physical asana is a measure of some higher possibility. Put your attention on what you want to have happen and be for it, and watch the magic unfold. What are you a yes for today? Please let me know in the comments section below of the web version of this blog. Live Your Yoga You want to balance a practice that works with a practice that counts. The challenge is recognizing that just because you’ve got your practice to a place that works for you emotionally and physically doesn’t necessarily mean it matters. A practice that matters is tied to something deeper: the powerful, spiritual, alive energy of yes. The only two forces at work in a pose are aliveness and patterns that block our aliveness. As patterns are dissolved and experienced, our body becomes clearer, and the flow from pose to pose begins to make more sense. It’s funny, but when the more alive the you emerges from behind the smokescreen of all those patterns of resistance (created by the energy of no) and begins to participate in the practice with resolution and directed focus of being a yes, the practice really does take on a purpose. It all somehow makes sense in a fantastic way. There is no use searching externally for purpose or trying to “pull it in.” It is already available right here in the pose. Just focus on clearing out and letting go of what is between you and aliveness: your energy of no. Aliveness and purpose are practically the same things, and they are both created by yes. The purpose is greater aliveness, so every time we generate greater aliveness, the purpose of the practice is being served. So the answer to how we create greater aliveness in our bodies and lives is always yes! Works Cited Baptiste, Baron. Perfectly Imperfect: The Art and Soul of Yoga Practice. Hay House, 2016.
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 Philosopher in Meditation Harmensz Van Rijn, known as Rembrandt (1606-1669) 1632, oil on wood, 28x34 cm, Musée de Louvre, Paris "Divinely I meditate I recently finished an MA program, and within 48 hours, I began feeling anxious. I thought, "I ought to be doing something, creating something, or contributing something... acting, doing." It was challenging to feel content with what I had accomplished or graciously bask in its glory. I worried that perhaps I wasn't enough, that maybe I lacked talent, skills, and worth now that I wasn't writing essays concerning the fallout of colonialism, racism, and other forms of oppression. I felt uncomfortable laying out my yoga mat and pretending to teach someone (for practice). It had been so long since I taught a yoga class, perhaps a year and a half. I wondered, "Is this who I am still? Am I just a yoga teacher? Am I worthy even for that role?" Eventually, my attempts to teach an imaginary student turned into a personal practice which turned into Reiki meditation, a flow of tears, and a moment of mindfulness. Picture it. My hands are in the air, above my head, and I begin saying the Reiki Principles to myself, "Just for today, don't be angry." My hands immediately start coming down as I am not angry, and I feel no radical amount of blockage or energy in that part of my aura/body. So I move towards my throat, "Just for today, do not worry." (Cue the tears). My hands organically come down to rest an inch in front of my heart, "Just for today, be grateful." And they settle there, feeling this pulsing of energy, this warmth, and a need for healing. "Just for today, be true to your way and your being" (more tears), "Be Kind to Yourself and Others." Like a mantra, I repeat these Reiki principles, and I let go. And I let go. And I let go. And here I am. Living in mindfulness means paying regular, calm attention to the present moment. It means checking in with yourself, the weight you might be carrying around, and the shallowness, or depth, of your breath. It means allowing yourself the time and space to be, feel, and process that which is occurring inside you, in your subconscious, and your heart. It means understanding your emotions and the actions they subconsciously cause. In the upcoming weeks, we will learn a silly-looking asana (The Lions Yawn), radical forms of pranayama, and nourishing asanas to add to our yoga flows. We will also practice mindfulness throughout. However, to move towards mindfulness, we must first understand what it is and how it is practiced. The Kriya book we have been working with, A Systematic Course in the Ancient Tantric Techniques of Yoga and Kriya by Satyananda Saraswati, has multiple lessons on mindfulness that we will, of course, explore. Still, for now, I'd like us to look at the painting above. If you'd prefer to be led through this exercise, then click on the audio recording located within the internet version of this blog post now (versus the newsletter as Mailchimp doesn't always include slideshows and recordings in their platform). Email Subscribers --> Click to Listen to Audio The first thing we see is the intense, yellow light of the winter sun outside -- a sun that dazzles without warmth. Then we notice the old man sitting motionless, having turned away from his table and the book he was studying. Is he thinking? Resting? Meditating? We look to the right and notice the low cellar door, then our eyes are drawn to the spiral staircase, but we have barely registered its first few steps when we notice the fire crackling in the grate and the woman stoking it. Finally, our eyes return to the staircase, but it leads only into darkness. The painting is small, the place it depicts is dark, yet we have a sense of immense space. This is the genius of Rembrandt, who leads us on a visual journey through all the dimensions. We travel the painting widthways left to right, from the daylight pouring into the fragile, almost derisory firelight. There's a dialogue established between the sun that lights but does not warm and the fire that warms but sheds no light. Are these the sun of reason and the fire of passion, two ingredients that combine in philosophy? We travel the painting's height by means of the spiral staircase that links the deep secrets of the cellar to the dark mysteries of the upper floor, and we travel its depth, from the background where the philosopher sits to the surrounding circle of shadows. But the sense of space also derives from the subtle interplay between all that is revealed and all that is hidden, where our imagination is crucial -- what lies on the other side of the window, behind the cellar door, at the top of the stairs? The largest of the worlds hidden from our restless eyes is the philosopher's mind, his inner world. Shadows and darkness, a little light, a little warmth, and a working mind -- is that what our inner selves are like? Meditation Means Stopping Stop doing, stop moving, stop twisting and turning. Meditation means withdrawing a little, stepping back from the world. At first, what we feel seems odd. There's an emptiness (no action or distraction) and a fullness (a tumult of thoughts and sensations that we suddenly notice). There's what we lack -- points of reference and things to do -- and, after a little while, there's the calm this lack brings. Things here are not the same as they are 'outside,' where our mind constantly attaches itself to some aim or project, acting or thinking about something in particular, having its attention held by some distraction. The apparent inaction of the experience of meditating takes a little while to get used to. As in Rembrandt's painting, or when we move from light to shadow, we don't see clearly straight away. We have gone inside ourselves, for real. Our inner world was close by, but we never went there. We tend to hang around outside; in today's world of frantic demands and frenzied connections, our relationship with ourselves often goes untended. We abandon our inner world. The outside world is easier to travel and better signposted. To meditate is often to move through a land without paths. In the room where the philosopher is meditating, there's less light, so you have to open your eyes wider. The same is true inside ourselves. There is less that is obvious or reassuring, so we must open our mind's eye much wider. We expected -- or hoped -- to find calm and emptiness. We often find ourselves in a huge, rowdy, chaotic bazaar. We aspired to clarity; we find confusion. Sometimes meditation exposes us to anxiety and pain, to things that hurt us and that we have avoided by thinking about something else or busily doing things elsewhere. Calming Agitation It all looked so simple from the outside! We thought it would be enough just to sit down and close our eyes. But no, that's just the start. It's indispensable, but not enough in itself. So what now? Now we have to work. We must learn to look, to remain slightly apart from the world, sitting just like this with closed eyes. We must learn to allow the tumult to settle. The first thing to accomplish is no more than that, sitting still and quiet for long enough to allow a kind of calm to settle around the chatter of our mind, enough for us to start seeing a bit more clearly. We must not try to achieve it by force or will -- that would only trigger more chaos. We must let it happen, let it come from inside.  Sometimes we have to wait a long time. This process is not something that can be rushed. We would like to speed it up, but no, meditation takes time. In fact, there are days when nothing comes at all, which may come as a bit of a shock and seem out of tune with times that promise us instant, guaranteed results. Zen wisdom has many tales to illustrate this point, such as the one about a student who asks his teacher, 'Master, how long will I have to meditate to attain serenity?' After a long silence, the master replies, Thirty years.' The student looks stricken. 'Er .. that's a very long time. What if I make twice the effort? What if I work really hard, day and night, and don't do anything else?' The teacher remains silent for a very long time and then says, 'Then it will take you fifty years.' Starting to See More Clearly So we have stopped, we have sat down, and closed our eyes. Not to sleep, not to rest, but to understand. We need to understand what we feel and put some order into the chaos that is simply the world's echo within ourselves. We must understand that there are two paths: the path of intelligence (acting, intervening, kneading reality with our will, lucidity, and effort) and the path of experience (welcoming naked reality and allowing it to cover, inhabit and imbue us, in a movement of intensely attentive letting go). Both intelligence and experience keep us in contact with the world, one enabling us to understand it better, the other to feel it better. Each, in its own way, is a perfect path. Neither is superior to the other. We need them both, and we must keep both alive and in working order. To put it more simply, we can say that the first path is that of philosophical thought, while the second (receiving the world without necessarily understanding it, or understanding it but without words, or beyond words) is that of mindfulness. It is the meditative approach of mindfulness that is the subject of the upcoming blog posts. Living in Mindfulness Mindfulness means intensifying our presence in the moment, stilling ourselves to absorb it instead of escaping it or trying to alter it through thought or action. There is mindfulness in the action of the philosopher who turns for a moment from his work of thinking and enters a different mode of being, digesting and assimilating all that his intelligence has just produced or discovered, preparing himself, perhaps, to go further still, and pausing to be aware. So mindfulness is not about creating emptiness, nor is it about producing thoughts. It means stopping in order to make contact with the ever-shifting experience that we are having at the time, and to observe the nature of our relationship to that experience, the nature of our presence at that moment. This is what is happening now if, while continuing to read these words attentively, you realize that you are also breathing and having bodily sensations, that there are other objects in your field of vision besides this blog, that there are sounds around you, that there are thoughts calling you away or murmuring assessments and judgments of what you are reading, and so on. Mindfulness means, just as you are about to erase this email or close this browser tab and move on to the next (perhaps your hand is already poised before you even finish reading these lines), halting your movement and observing, for example, the intention to close the tab, the intention that's already within you. Saying to yourself, 'I'm going to close/turn the page,' rather than doing it without even noticing. Mindfulness means making a tiny space every now and then to see ourselves doing something. You will tell me we don't need to do this in order to erase an email or turn a page. And that is true. On the other hand, it may prove useful at many other times in our lives. Works Cited:
Saraswati, Satyananda. A Systematic Course in the Ancient Tantric Techniques of Yoga and Kriya. Yoga Publications Trust, 2013. André Christophe. Mindfulness: 25 Ways to Live in the Moment Through Art. Replika Press, 2014.  A BRAVE AND STARTLING TRUTH
We, this people, on a small and lonely planet Traveling through casual space Past aloof stars, across the way of indifferent suns To a destination where all signs tell us It is possible and imperative that we learn A brave and startling truth And when we come to it To the day of peacemaking When we release our fingers From fists of hostility And allow the pure air to cool our palms When we come to it When the curtain falls on the minstrel show of hate And faces sooted with scorn are scrubbed clean When battlefields and coliseum No longer rake our unique and particular sons and daughters Up with the bruised and bloody grass To lie in identical plots in foreign soil When the rapacious storming of the churches The screaming racket in the temples have ceased When the pennants are waving gaily When the banners of the world tremble Stoutly in the good, clean breeze When we come to it When we let the rifles fall from our shoulders And children dress their dolls in flags of truce When land mines of death have been removed And the aged can walk into evenings of peace When religious ritual is not perfumed By the incense of burning flesh And childhood dreams are not kicked awake By nightmares of abuse When we come to it Then we will confess that not the Pyramids With their stones set in mysterious perfection Nor the Gardens of Babylon Hanging as eternal beauty In our collective memory Not the Grand Canyon Kindled into delicious color By Western sunsets Nor the Danube, flowing its blue soul into Europe Not the sacred peak of Mount Fuji Stretching to the Rising Sun Neither Father Amazon nor Mother Mississippi who, without favor, Nurture all creatures in the depths and on the shores These are not the only wonders of the world When we come to it We, this people, on this minuscule and kithless globe Who reach daily for the bomb, the blade and the dagger Yet who petition in the dark for tokens of peace We, this people on this mote of matter In whose mouths abide cankerous words Which challenge our very existence Yet out of those same mouths Come songs of such exquisite sweetness That the heart falters in its labor And the body is quieted into awe We, this people, on this small and drifting planet Whose hands can strike with such abandon That in a twinkling, life is sapped from the living Yet those same hands can touch with such healing, irresistible tenderness That the haughty neck is happy to bow And the proud back is glad to bend Out of such chaos, of such contradiction We learn that we are neither devils nor divines When we come to it We, this people, on this wayward, floating body Created on this earth, of this earth Have the power to fashion for this earth A climate where every man and every woman Can live freely without sanctimonious piety Without crippling fear When we come to it We must confess that we are the possible We are the miraculous, the true wonder of this world That is when, and only when We come to it.  About a week ago, I read the next chapter from the book I've re-explored since March, "A Systematic Course in the Ancient Tantric Techniques of Yoga and Kriya." The topic's title was "The Root Cause of Tension," and the chapter offered readers an opportunity to relieve the body and mind of tension. I can't think of a better time for this chapter to reenter my life and perhaps enter yours for the first time. As protests against injustice and racism occur worldwide in response to the death of George Floyd (and so many others), physical and emotional pain emanates from the hearts and faces of the people I view on the news. This most recent rise of global confusion, frustration, and understandable anger also seems exacerbated by the not-so-positive impacts of our global pandemic: fear, impatience, and anxiety. Not to mention the other worries that pile up as a result of global warming, climate change, and dirty politicians. It doesn't seem like such a surprise then that our world appears so tense, right? That so much in our world can result in tension in our bodies and minds? What if I told you that by taking the time to read the 10 Codes for Mental Reprogramming as specified in our Kriya yoga book, your outlook on life would improve immediately? It's true. I promise! However, the choice is yours: you can take steps to make this world and your life a veritable heaven on earth, or you can remain as you are. In this blog I’ve included the following gifts:
The Root Cause of Tension The codes that Swami Satyananda Saraswati formulated are not intended to be moralistic. They are a means to an end. To reiterate, they are suggestions by which you can start to consciously alter your attitude towards life's situations. They are intended to relax you sufficiently, so that you can eventually delve into your mind through meditation practices and thereby root out the deeper negative aspects of your mental nature. These codes are not supposed to change your lifestyle, and we don't advise you to force them on yourself at all times. Only remember them as you go about your daily routine and their presence will help you from within, from your subconsious 'attitude centres'. (61) Codes for Mental Reprogramming Code 1: Make the effort to begin to accept other people fully. Try not to see them merely as objects to be used for your own gratification. Try to accept others as also acting in accordance with their mental conditioning. What you see in them is only an external manifestation of their mental program. In this way they are no different from you, except their program may be a little different. You are now aware of your dependence on your mental conditioning; perhaps they don’t realize it yet. If you can accept others more they in turn will start to accept you. Laugh at yourself, at your behavior and at your antics. Code 2: Accept yourself. Know that your actions are the result of your mental makeup. For this reason, don’t worry about your deficiencies and problems. Accept your limitations. But at the same time feel the need to clean the mind of its conflicts. It is our inability to accept ourselves that causes so much anguish in life. Code 3: Watch your habituated reactions to people around you and to your environment. Watch how your attachment to the external can result in so much discontentment. Try to reduce your need to find happiness in outside things. This does not mean that you should not follow external attractions for this would result in suppression, which causes more harm than good. It means that you should carry on your life as it is now, but if you don’t get what you want then accept it with a shrug of the shoulders, with a sense of detachment. Code 4: Find out your greatest needs, attachments, desires, etc. Be as critical as you can. A good method of discovering your attachments is to trace the cause of your present anger or your present unhappiness back to its source and there you will find the emotional and mental attitude that caused the disturbance. Particularly notice how you react with people whom you distinctively dislike or don’t get on with. These persons will help you to recognize and to eventually remove your emotional hang-ups. View the whole word and everyone in it as being your teacher. Code 5: Try to live in the now. Don’t live in the past by worrying about what has already happened or by reliving pleasurable past experiences. Don’t anticipate the future. Plans can be made, but see the planning as being part of the now, not as really being for the future. Try to live each moment, each present moment as fully as possible by giving your attention to the now. In this way you will start to live life to the fullest. When you do anything, from taking a bath to eating food, or sweeping the floor to earning your living, try not to think of when it will be finished. Enjoy every action that you do at the time that you do it. Try to enjoy the fact that you exist and that an expression of your existence is in your every action. Code 6: Don’t identify yourself completely with your actions, your body or your mind. Though you are trying to change your mind, it is only part of you. It is not your consciousness – the witness that sees all events that occur in your life. Code 7: Try to be more opens towards other people. Express your true feelings as much as possible. When we try to be what we are not, when we try to impress people and when we hide our inner feelings from others, we immediately experience mental tension and alienation. This tends to intensify our feelings of ‘me against the world’. Code 8: Remember that everyone has the potential to attain higher levels of awareness. A mans present attitude toward his environment or toward you is caused by mental programming. His present mode of living is temporary and will change and become more harmonious if and when he starts to understand himself and his mind. All of us have unrealized potential just waiting to be tapped. Try to see this potential in all people, no matter how different it may be. Code 9: Don’t avoid difficult situations. Normally we shape our lives so that we interact with people we dislike as little as possible. We continually try to associate ourselves with people and situations that tune in with our motional programming. As such we continue to live in a way that reinforces and satisfies our individual prejudices. Treat difficult situations and enemies as the greatest teachers. It is they who can show us most clearly the way in which our mental program works. It is our enemies who bring to the surface our emotional conflicts and prejudices. Very few of us are aware of programming and conditioning. When we recognize it then we can start to deal with it. Code 10: Try to put yourself in other people’s shoes. Instead of blindly reacting in ways that you are programmed, try to see the other person’s point of view. Remember your reaction is purely automatic. Try to change your response so that the current situation doesn’t cause you emotional upsets. Lesson 2.6: Pages from the BookThe Root Cause of Tension |
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What is Mindfulness?
Mindfulness can be defined as “the awareness that arises from paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally.”[1]
More on this next time, too.
[1] Jon Kabat-Zinn, Coming to Our Senses (New York: Hyperion, 2005), 108.
More on this next time, too.
[1] Jon Kabat-Zinn, Coming to Our Senses (New York: Hyperion, 2005), 108.
For Further Reading Preparation...
Should You Practice Yoga? Why?
Your reason for wanting to practice yoga or your reason for currently practicing yoga is not important. The important thing is that you have overcome previous prejudices and postponements to try yoga for yourself. You have overcome the biggest obstacle...
Me & Isa practicing Baby AcroYoga When my daughter Isabella was born late last year, I spent almost every single moment carrying her in my arms. Lifting her. Setting her down. Holding her. Giving her alllll my love. That of course, hasn't changed. However, as a result of all that original activity and because I was unaware of the excess weight I was putting onto my thumbs and the tendons that help them to function, I ended up with a relentless injury called De Quervain's tendinosis, which has yet to heal to this day (she's ten 1/2 months old).
As a result of this injury, I have had to discontinue my advanced power yoga practice as well as my other interest -- Muay Thai -- which means no more handstands, jump backs, side planks, punching bags... things like that. At first, I felt depressed at the state my body was in. Although I understood that I needed to be patient with my body as it recovered from having made and delivered a baby girl, I was depressed and frustrated that I wasn't able to care for my body the way I was used to caring for it - via hardcore daily Yoga and Muay Thai. I also wasn't able to care for my family the way I truly wanted to - I felt like an invalid. In the mornings I would wake to find my hands stiff and in pain. By the end of the day, after cleaning and cooking, caring for Isabella, etc... I could hardly move them. Mentally, I thought that I had no more energy to give to a yoga practice. I also found that my ego disliked the idea of doing any yoga practice that wasn't the usual intense, cardio-activating practice I was accustomed. It was a negative spiral for a while.
Finally though, and only after my first 8-hour sleep in months 6 months haha, I went to my mat with discipline and an internal mantra/repetitive thought:
As a result of this injury, I have had to discontinue my advanced power yoga practice as well as my other interest -- Muay Thai -- which means no more handstands, jump backs, side planks, punching bags... things like that. At first, I felt depressed at the state my body was in. Although I understood that I needed to be patient with my body as it recovered from having made and delivered a baby girl, I was depressed and frustrated that I wasn't able to care for my body the way I was used to caring for it - via hardcore daily Yoga and Muay Thai. I also wasn't able to care for my family the way I truly wanted to - I felt like an invalid. In the mornings I would wake to find my hands stiff and in pain. By the end of the day, after cleaning and cooking, caring for Isabella, etc... I could hardly move them. Mentally, I thought that I had no more energy to give to a yoga practice. I also found that my ego disliked the idea of doing any yoga practice that wasn't the usual intense, cardio-activating practice I was accustomed. It was a negative spiral for a while.
Finally though, and only after my first 8-hour sleep in months 6 months haha, I went to my mat with discipline and an internal mantra/repetitive thought:
It doesn't matter that I can't do push-ups right now. It doesn't matter that my body no longer feels as limber. I am going to start moving now and I will figure this out.
In the absence of the norm, I found myself becoming more creative with my yoga flows. I became acquainted with new poses, old poses, different parts of my body and especially my breath and thought patterns. I created yoga practices for myself which did not need to include my hands on the floor. I started "teaching in my mind" as if I were teaching other students who happened to have the same type of injury as myself - hands, wrists, or otherwise. As a result, I began to heal. Not only my hands (which are getting there with the help of a therapist) but my mind and soul too.
I realize now that I was being harsh with myself, literally inflexible and unbending. I was so used to a certain "Ashley" and certain "Yoga style" that I had been unwilling to accept my limitations, body, or self. How sad is that? How much time, I wonder, did I waste not practicing yoga simply because I couldn't do what I wanted? How silly!?
After meditating and reflecting on it all, I've forgiven myself and I am now ready to finally share what I have learned from this whole experience. And here it is:
I realize now that I was being harsh with myself, literally inflexible and unbending. I was so used to a certain "Ashley" and certain "Yoga style" that I had been unwilling to accept my limitations, body, or self. How sad is that? How much time, I wonder, did I waste not practicing yoga simply because I couldn't do what I wanted? How silly!?
After meditating and reflecting on it all, I've forgiven myself and I am now ready to finally share what I have learned from this whole experience. And here it is:
Beginner's Yoga is just as amazing as Advanced Yoga because Yoga is about learning to accept the present limits of your current body - to embrace, move in it, grow with it, love it.
So, when and if you decide to begin a Yoga practice, whether you are advanced or new to Yoga, the key is to accept and love your body and your practice, no matter what it looks like or feels like. ❤ ~ Ashley
YOGA RESOURCES
I WANT TO SHARE with you here a few resources that I have either recently come across or have been an avid user/follower of now for years. For example, meet Laruga Glaser! She is a beautiful, talented, and super-flexible/inspirational yogini. Was she born that way? I don't know. What I do know is that she has been a yogini for many, many years. Which means, that her beautiful practice is a complete and total result of what? HER PRACTICE. It's hers. Not yours. Not mine. Hers. And yet, although I will probably never be able to do all the poses that she does, no matter how much effort and energy I put into my practice, I can still admire her. I can still try to emulate her in my own ways, in my own practice - by practicing often and with discipline. And so can you!
The following video is of Laruga teaching Ashtanga Yoga. For more about Ashtanga yoga, consider reading one of my previous blogs such as "What is Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga". However, for now, consider watching the flow for at least the first 10-15 minutes. It may seem repetitive - because it is. That is one of the defining factors of Ashtanga Yoga. Within those repetition, your mind is given an opportunity to stop jumping from one thing to another - your practice becomes a moving meditation.
The following video is of Laruga teaching Ashtanga Yoga. For more about Ashtanga yoga, consider reading one of my previous blogs such as "What is Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga". However, for now, consider watching the flow for at least the first 10-15 minutes. It may seem repetitive - because it is. That is one of the defining factors of Ashtanga Yoga. Within those repetition, your mind is given an opportunity to stop jumping from one thing to another - your practice becomes a moving meditation.
Purple Valley Ashtanga Yoga. (2018, March 19). Led Primary Series with Laruga Glaser. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SefpsUfI7y4&t=384s
I PRACTICED with the above video yesterday while Isabella was playing with a Tibetan singing bowl next to me (video below). :) Even though I have studied at the K.PATTABHI JOIS ASHTANGA YOGA SHALA, I don't usually practice Ashtanga Yoga as my main practice, so I too had to look up at the video some... and you may have to look up sometimes as well. NO WORRIES! Oh, and you'll also notice the use of numbers (though you may not have known they were numbers) said in a strange language. That language is Sanskrit. No worries again! You don't have to learn Sanskrit to practice yoga, but you will eventually learn some words such as CHATURANGA! haha as a by-product of your practice. Yoga is Sanskrit too --> योग ;)
After viewing the video, maybe you decide that you love it, or maybe you think Ashtanga isn't for you. That's totally okay! But please don't turn your back on it too quickly... or any type of yoga, really. My advice before you give up on a yoga style is to:
After viewing the video, maybe you decide that you love it, or maybe you think Ashtanga isn't for you. That's totally okay! But please don't turn your back on it too quickly... or any type of yoga, really. My advice before you give up on a yoga style is to:
- Considering trying a few more times
- Consider trying a different teacher
- Consider going to a different class
In this video, you can hear Laruga counting out the asanas :) You might also notice me modifying poses because it hurts my injured hands. Modifications are totally fine! Please don’t ever feel ashamed to modify your poses like I do, or by using a block or a strap. We were all beginners once.
OTHER YOGA BLOGS
- PEACE LOVE YOGA - This is Laruga's blog! It's where I found her video. I love her blog. She's simply inspirational.
- WHAT IS A YOGI? AND HOW DO YOU BECOME ONE? By Timothy Burgin - Consider giving this a read if you have this question on your mind :)
- DO YOU YOGA - DoYouYoga has a whole plethora of videos and challenges for you to participate in. Their website is huge, with many of your questions already answered in articles, blogs, videos and more. If you're looking to begin living a healthier lifestyle all around (food, mind, body) then consider looking into the programs they offer.
- YOGA BASICS - Yep, everything you need to know to get started, for the most part ;)
- WANDERLUST - This website has a "journal" / blog which contains lots of general information about yoga and how to begin living a life that includes it.
- YOGADORK - Yeah, it's a funny name. But this blog has so much information about the current events occurring in the yoga world. If you're curious, take a look. This link, for example, is offering information about the screening of a film regarding a teacher, Iyengar. He is another of my favorite yoga teachers of all time.
kinolorber. (2019, March 4). Iyengar: The Man, Yoga, and the Student's Journey - Official Trailer. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dvqQwr8xfgc&feature=youtu.be
My Message
Love is the essence of our life. I have written this blog with love, and I offer it to you, dear reader, with the hope that the suggestions offered here will become a vital part of your self-healing and continued well-being. ~ Ashley
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